On the Verge EP

by Calculus

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shaneblewitt Brilliant EP filled with great lyrics and a desire to succeed! 10/10. Favorite track: Medicine.
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1.
03:54
2.
04:06
3.
4.
03:10
5.
03:40

about

Calculus' first EP.

credits

released February 6, 2013

All songs written by: Callum Murray
Guitars/drums/bass/vocals: Callum Murray
All songs produced by: David Wilson
Recorded at: David Wilson Recordings

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all rights reserved

about

Calculus Albury, Australia

Calculus is a hybrid of rock and hip hop, drawing from influences such as Metallica and Ozzy Osbourne to Eminem or Tupac, Jeff Buckley to the Red Hot Chili Peppers. He tells stories through the use of dynamic musical arrangements and well-flowing lyrics, each songs a unique tale. ... more

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Track Name: On the Verge
We all make promises that we can't keep
Lay awake in the night coz we can't sleep
Stay awake coz you're right in the dark deep
Of your mind, and you just think that you can't breathe
We all take and we break all the trust, and
It destroys all the love and the justice
And you know that you think that you must have
Everything in line and perfect, it's just that
Steep lies of a cheap kind
rewind
To the times of your peak mind
Disguised as your dreams
With your weak eyes
Bleak signs
Seek lines in between
Deep kinds of sick minds
Past haunts with the last thoughts
Behind
But they taunt and they cast sorts of a speech, signs
So distraught with your life
Caught in the lights blind
Every day you suffer from events from your past times

You're constantly fighting with yourself
Wanting to scream, you wanna yell
Lifting up that blade
You're fighting with the urge
Crying your eyes out every night
Feeling this pain, not only slight
Trapped inside this cage
You're standing on the verge

Coz you're down in the memories of what's gone
But soon you gotta found out what's the lost cause
Lost all of the costs, fall down
When you stall and you crawl
And it cost more, what for?
Coz you're stuck in a cage and you just wait
And you're feeling insane but it's just fate
Trust feels so real
That when it's too late
You can actually feel it
Start to break
Felt this but I dealt with
These things
Blades that are hellish
And I'm selfish
Bring me to a place where I tell shit
And it stings me to the point
Of a held wish
And I can't breathe
And I can't see
Don't start please
Just believe when I say these things
And you'll see
It's a part of me
But departing me
No longer after me
And now I'm starting free

You're constantly fighting with yourself
Wanting to scream, you wanna yell
Lifting up that blade
You're fighting with the urge
Crying your eyes out every night
Feeling this pain, not only slight
Trapped inside this cage
You're standing on the verge
Track Name: Medicine
I've got this sickness and it's eating away
Biting off more of me each day
I'd thought I'd fly high, land fine
Then the sky went and broke right then
Shattered like a land mine
Had gone off and destroyed everything around me
From the top
And straight down to the ground see
I have been stepped on
Issues to be addressed on
I was lost, but then you came and found me
I've been searching for a cure
And I lost myself
Couldn't find my way back
And I lost my health
I've been feeling down
For a couple days now
Is it you that's come around now to help?
I've been searching for a cure
Could it be you?
Oh how I hope it is
My words are true
And Now just tell me
What would you do
What would you do if I

What would you do if I called you my medicine
Healed me from the pain I'm forever in
Coz I felt it'd never end
Living like I was my only friend
What would you do if I called you my medicine

My blood's pumping with this shit
That I can't feel
My head's sending me these thoughts
That just aren't real
They're just dreams and it
Seems that I'm stuck here
I'm all alone
Could I be out of luck here?
But when I saw you
Everything just seemed to change
And thank you
Coz I was getting sick of seeing the same
Days flying by, lies always trying, like
Eating at me from the inside, silent strikes
But they were turning violent
That's not my type
When it comes to fight or flight
I'd rather take the sky
Soaring over all these problems and issues
But things started to change when I met you
You were the vaccine
Killing off the taxi's
Carrying attacks, weak
From the strength I lack, please
Stick around and help fight off this pain
So I never have to feel this shit again

What would you do if I called you my medicine
Healed me from the pain I'm forever in
Coz I felt it'd never end
Living like I was my only friend
What would you do if I called you my medicine
What would you do if I called you my medicine
Healed me from the pain I'm forever in
Coz I felt it'd never end
Living like I was my only friend
What would you do if I called you my medicine

What would you do if I asked you to save me
From how I've been feeling lately
I can't believe
Can't conceive
That I've been deceived
I need someone to help me
Getting sick and tired of yelling
Whoa-oh, oh-ho

What would you do if I called you my medicine
Healed me from the pain I'm forever in
Coz I felt it'd never end
Living like I was my only friend
What would you do if I called you my medicine
What would you do if I called you my medicine
Healed me from the pain I'm forever in
Coz I felt it'd never end
Living like I was my only friend
What would you do if I called you my medicine
Track Name: King of the World
Got me sitting in this different place of mind
Everything I'm doing leaves me way behind
Drugging up on bottles kinda makes me blind
I'm wasting time, sitting in this caged device
Ever since I made myself be living here
Knowing now that it's cause I'm filled with fear
Though I'm feeling everybody's hurtful drilling leers
Spinning gears
Sitting here, I'm still in tears
During high school I was teased and bullied
When I went home I cut my arm fully
No one ever asked if I was fucking harmed
Could he ever go back to the place
Where he was always down, pulling
Breaths from the space that was left in his chest
Detest all the rest
We're best now they're left in the dust
And you know that I must try forget
Coz I'm blessed with repent
And I'm sent to defend
I know that it hurt
And they know that it worked
Coz they left with a smirk
Now I'm left with rebirth
Coz I rose from the ground
Without making a sound
Though I'm drowning it out

Coz I am king of the world
And you will know my name
I am king of myself
And now I'm feeling sane
I'll defeat all these scars
Until my skin's the same
Colour as it was before
Before the hurt and shame

You gotta get given the power to save yourself
No matter how much you might want that razors help
But I hope you know that these blades can tell
That you've been sitting here thinking bout raising hell
Your mind's drawing lines
Making deals with demon's
Going against a god
That you don't believe in
Even though sometimes
You feel that you're dreaming
Try to hide that inside
You're screaming
Haunted by thoughts of the past
They lurk
Never go away coz they last
And they hurt
They're absurd
And you know that they're purpose is burnt
By the flames of their words
And the pains of their smirks
With a knife to the wrist
You can cut all the pain
Out of your mind
And out of your veins
Without a life you've got nothing to lose
But on the same page you've got nothing to gain
Yeah you've taken their shit
Yeah you've taken their hits
And yeah you've taken their spit
Go home with split lips
And bruised eyes that you tried
To disguise with lies
Hiding away when you'd sit and you'd cry
Coz you bury yourself
In all the sorrow and shame
But you gotta get back on your feet again
To show them that you've won
And not lost in the end
That you're the only one
On whom you can depend
And it hurts and it hurts
And it hurts worse, and it's worse
Than being stabbed in the back
A heartless attack, and it lacks
Justification
With endless suffocation
You can end this situation

Coz I am king of the world
And you will know my name
I am king of myself
And now I'm feeling sane
I'll defeat all these scars
Until my skin's the same
Colour as it was before
Before the hurt and shame
You were king of my mind
You led me to defeat
I am king of the blind
I'll lead them till they see
Coz I am king of the world
And you will know it's true
Coz I am king of the world
So who the fuck are you

All these lies
And all this pain
Is running through my veins
All these marks
And all these scars

Coz I am king of the world
And you will know my name
I am king of myself
And now I'm feeling sane
I'll defeat all these scars
Until my skin's the same
Colour as it was before
Before the hurt and shame
You were king of my mind
You led me to defeat
I am king of the blind
I'll lead them till they see
Coz I am king of the world
And you will know it's true
Coz I am king of the world
So who the fuck are you
Track Name: Save Me
Lately I've been feeling a little under the weather
But I don't know whether to tell you or not
Lately I've been feeling that I can't get better
So I just take a shot
Then I take another
Coz I'm down in the drinks
Don't know what to think
That maybe I should rot
And destroy my body
On alcohol and coffee
But it doesn't seem like a lot
Coz when you start
You just can't stop
Drop everything is falling apart
Cough medicine
Heart's pumping anything
But the blood
Thick as mud
Bud's better than
Fuck, no synonym
To explain feeling this way
Deranged, killing my brain
Stains wanting to stay away
Drilling
So insane, still isn't tame
Names running my brain
To blame you for this game
That I'm winning in
(Drink)
You know I wanna sink every last drop
(Drink)
You know I wanna drink till I can't stop
Drink till my words slur
Worse than a curse word
Ride home in hearses
And write verses
That concern her
(Think)
You know I cannot think when I drink this
(Think)
You know I can't resist doing this shit
Think about these words
Sit, hitting up a verse
Lit cigarettes to nurse
Pit, edging up my nerves

And I just want someone to come
And save me from myself
I am crying out for help
Right now
So please
Save me from myself

I'm sitting in the corner
Feel so insane
My life's all out of order
Not in the right
Frame of mind
I came to find
Everything that's made inside
This case of mine
Did you hear that?
This here is a story
It needs to be told
It's not really that gory
It's about how I mould myself
And hold myself
Killing off the cold and well
Going to hell
Sitting in this
(Prison cell so)
Tears running down my cheeks
(And I fell low)
Straight from my very peak
I'm weak and tired
I seek to find
My little wires decide
These different signs
Try to hide em
But if you let me speak
Straight from the heart, you'll see
How everything was
Falling apart for me
It was my only option to drown in seas
Of expensive little friends
Their name's whiskey
This reality's haunting me
Scaring me, taunting me
Honestly it's frightening
It's striking me as hard to see
With these dreams, memories
Put to rest with this Turkey
Failing tests
My fuckin' vision's blurry
I learned to put my faith into something else
Something that's in a bottle and sits on the shelf
Something that's always there when I'm needing help
Something that listens to my screaming yells

And I just want someone to come
And save me from myself
I am crying out for help
Right now
So please
Save me from myself

I just want someone to come
Save me from myself
I am crying out for help
Right now
So please
Save me from myself
Track Name: Reflections
Don't know where it started
Don't know how I got here
All I know is that I
Don't wanna have them leering
Over everything I do
Just believe me, you
I'll get out of this place
Hopefully one day soon
It hurts to have them hating
I'm in such a state and
It's so infuriating
And from the mouths of Satan
They speak words of injustice
Because I did you wrong
But I should have known
From the start, all along that
It's hard to trust someone
And let them get so close
And when the day is done
They're the ones that you love most
And they break down that wall
And they find a way inside
And you regret it all
So many nights you've cried

I wish I was a better person
That I treated you right
I wish I had enough courage in me
To lose a fight, but
I always was too proud
My voice was way too loud
It always lifted itself up
Way up above the clouds
I've always had trouble telling you how I felt, but
Leaving you was the thing
That most probably dealt the
Biggest blow
Of this entire situation here
Just listen to these words and think
Just forget my dear
All the troubles we had
And all the time we lost
I always thought I was right
Now look what it has cost
I was so happy
Now I'm sad and lonely and depressed
Constantly reminiscing
Hoping we have something left

Ohh-whoa-oh-oh
Ohh-whoa-oh-oh
Ohh-whoa-oh-oh
Ohh-whoa-oh-oh

I look in the mirror
And what do I see
A reflection of uncertainty
I try to see clearer
But it's not up to me
What I've tried to be

Ohh-whoa-oh-oh
Ohh-whoa-oh-oh
Ohh-whoa-oh-oh
Ohh-whoa-oh-oh